


Yours To Hold

by TheOrgasmicSeke



Series: All My Heart [3]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: A lot - Freeform, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Bulges and Nooks, Established Relationship, Fluff, I can't believe I actually wrote this, John's POV, M/M, Nook Eating, POV First Person, Porn With Plot, Rutting, Self Fucking, Smut, bulge in nook, i fuck with troll anatomy, i'm not even posting it on ff.net because it's so smutty, lots to tag here, love making, my own headcanons put to use, they love each other tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-27
Updated: 2014-05-27
Packaged: 2018-01-26 20:21:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1701278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheOrgasmicSeke/pseuds/TheOrgasmicSeke
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's not easy to admit to a guy who thoroughly believes that true love is a joke that you're in love with him. It's not easy when it's only been four months. It's not easy when he's all you can think about every moment of your life and all you dream about. Love's not easy. But loving Karkat? I fell easier than I ever thought possible.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Yours To Hold

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so for starters, this whole idea is based on a prompt a lovely little person gave me a while ago. I loved it so I brought it here.
> 
> This is based in the same universe as Heart On The Floor. Pay attention to that. It's kinda important.
> 
> It's also a bit based on [This lovely fanwork](http://felinefan.tumblr.com/post/84071590590/happy-birthday-maihyuga)
> 
> Warnings: Lots and lots of sex. Smutty dirty stuff that made me blush like a virgin writing it. But it's also fluffy. All this love stuffs got me feeling all up and motherfucking happy man.
> 
> Disclaimer: you know I don't own em.

* * *

It was a miracle honestly. A damn near blessing that somehow I had managed to snag the heart of a troll. And not just any troll. Though Karkat was well-known for being a romantic, he wasn't easy to get a hold of. He kept a wall in front of his heart that he never broke down. Even though it made our relationship a littler harder, I never blamed him for it. He'd been hurt in the past so it was only natural for him to protect himself. But I wasn't like the other people he'd dated and he knew that.

Four months was a short span of time but again it wasn't. Plenty of time to spend together. To get to know one another. To learn and grow together. Hell it was a lot longer than Jade ever thought we would last and I certainly planned to last even longer. Much longer in fact. Because I loved him. Not that I told him that yet. Love was a sensitive subject and I didn't want to just bring it up out of the blue and scare him off. Karkat was easily scared and I didn't want to do anything to lose him.

Confessing that I had managed to fall in love with him after only four months was definitely something that would scare him off. It wasn't like I could help it though. I mean, Karkat was amazing. Okay sure, he had his moments. He had one hell of a temper and was pretty grumpy most of the time but I knew how to pick and probe and get him to smile. Because deep down, He wanted to be loved.

"Do I even want to know what is going in that useless thinkpan of yours?" His guff voice was slightly mumbled thanks to the cheek pressed against my chest.

"Whatever do you mean?" I asked innocently, a smile tugging at my lips as my hand in his hair stilled slightly.

Karkat grunted softly while he shifted the hand that had been hanging over the side of the couch to curl against my chest. "Grubfisted dork." He mumbled, nuzzling slightly against my chest so his hair tickled my chin slightly. "Don't play stupid, it's insulting to the other idiots."

I began carding through his soft raven hair once again, purposely avoiding the sensitive nubs nestled in it. "I was just thinking."

He snorted softly. "Don't hurt yourself."

I rolled my eyes, used to his teasing. "Fine, then I _won't_ tell you how I want to fuck you tonight."

The way his body went rigid against mine proved I had his attention. I couldn't help the smirk that came to my lips and purposely brushed a finger tip over the side of a horn. He let out a soft shudder that made my skin crawl. Damn he was sexy. And he knew it too. He knew I knew it. Hell, nothing had really changed since the first night we met at the bar. Cept that I was in love with the troll.

"Fuck you." He grumbled, tucking his head under my chin while his hand curled against his collar-bone. "Gam is still here. Keep that nookfucking thing in your pants."

I snickered softly, letting my fingers trail away from his horns to pet softly at his hair. My other hand was curled behind my head in a makeshift pillow, keeping my neck at a comfortable angle so I could watch the movie Karkat had picked. It was another romcom but I was used to them. They weren't _that_ bad. Karkat's taste in movies wasn't _that_ bad.

Karkat's apartment was where we spent most of our time. We both had busy lives but I'd stop by every day after work because he would be home already, considering he was off before I, and we'd have dinner together. Be it something he made, Gamzee made or we ordered out, it was all great. Because just spending time with the troll was a thrill. We didn't have to go out to have fun together. Our favorite thing to do was just cuddle on the couch and watch movies. How could it get any better than that? I didn't think it could. I didn't even mind when Gamzee joined in our movie marathons. He was a pretty cool guy.

"That's pathetic." Karkat mumbled softly, his warmth breath seeping into the thin fabric of my shirt.

I blinked a few times, realizing I'd just been staring at him and not paying any attention to the movie. My eyes flicked to the screen, quickly trying to judge what happened but I had no clue. "What is?"

He grunted softly. "It's not even realistic." I could tell by his tone, Dr. Vantas was coming out. "People don't just fall in love after only knowing one another for a short period of time. It doesn't work like that. You set yourself up for failure when you do that. You fall in lust, not love. And then BOOM," He waved a hand in the air, "a year down the line you come to find the person you thought you loved isn't right for you. Because you followed your dick and not your heart. Bullshit really." He hissed the last sentence as he let his hand fall back down the side of the couch.

I bit my lower lip, working it a bit before smiling softly. "I don't know, Karkat. I'm no expert in love like you but I think people can fall in love quickly. What about true love?" I asked, already knowing the answer because it was a conversation we had a lot.

"Horseshit." He snorted. "Doesn't exist."

I hummed softly, petting his hair as I glanced down at him, able to see the curve of his cute little nose and his lips. "Just in movies?"

"Just in movies." He agreed.

I let the conversation drop because I really didn't want to get into it with him. Sure, we fought sometimes. He was a stubborn little prick when he wanted to be but this was something I didn't want to fight about. Hell, I wasn't even ready to tell him how I felt. So I continued to pet his hair soothingly while we watched the end of a movie I had only been paying half attention to.

My hand stilled in his hair, resting there as the credits began to roll. Of course the guy got the girl. That's how it always worked. "If you don't believe in it, then why do these movies make you cry?" I pondered softly, glancing down at the softly sniffling troll.

Karkat grumbled softly, shifting to press his face into my chest. "Shut up." He mumbled softly.

I couldn't help but laugh softly. "You're a true romantic at heart, admit it! You may not believe in it but you're hopeful."

"Fuck you."

God he was so cute. I tugged my hand from behind my head and used both to ruffle his already messy black hair. "Aw, come on, babe. Admit it. You want all the fluffy lovey dovey stuff in your life and hey, I'm doing my best here." I laughed softly when he smacked my hands away but still didn't move off of me. "So I guess when I tell you I love you, I gotta do it right, yeah? Like this big ordeal with flowers and candles and junk."

The way he flinched caused me slight alarm. "When?"

"What?" I blinked in confusion, watching as he shifted to sit in my lap, his hand resting on my stomach as he stared down at me with an expression I couldn't read.

"You said 'when'. Not 'if'." His voice was even and it caused me more alarm.

"I, uh." I swallowed hard, shifting to lean on my elbows. Fuck. No. Red flag. Red fucking flag. "So?"

"So." His eyes narrowed slightly. "'When' suggests you already do."

I just gaped at him. Fuck. Abort. Fucking abort. Turn back around. Start over. REFREASH. ABORT ABORT ABORT. I was at a loss for words. He was staring at me like he knew something. His eyes were slightly wide, his lips were parted so I could see those fangs and his face... was flushed. Fuck I loved that. I loved the way his grey skin could turn red. ABORT. "I do."

Well shit. Way to go. Fuck you mouth. You are not longer allowed on the S.S. John. You are officially kicked off. BANISHED!

"What?" The word was spoken so softly I hardly heard it through my mental abuse. I blinked, swallowing hard and holy crabapples his entire face was red, right to the tip of his ears and his eyes were... glowing? The crimson was overtaking the yellow.

"I mean, I uh. I do. I love you. I'm in love with you." I TOLD YOU, YOU WERE BANISHED MOUTH. "But it's not like it's that easy to tell you. I mean, you have this whole thing about not falling in love so quickly, that it's not possible and I'm over here like, oh yea wait I already love you. What the fuck am I supposed to do about that? And I'm terrified of scaring you away because yea, even I'm a little scared of how strong my feelings are but they're real and there's nothing I can do about them and i-mmph."

My rant skirted to a halt when Karkat clamped down both of his hands over my traitorous mouth. Thank fucking christ. My heart raced, my breath came in pants and I noticed how he was... shaking. He was shaking, his head hanging between his outstretched arms to the point that I couldn't see his face. Oh shit. Ohhhhhh crap. I could feel his claws digging into my cheeks and that prevented me from even trying to speak. I could only sit there and pray I hadn't fucked up.

"Yo, Karbro, Johnbro." I snapped my eyes to the lanky troll shuffling into the living room. There was a soft smile on his lips as he glanced at us, taking in our position with a tilt of his head. "Don't wait up for little ol' me." He flicked a wave at us, snatched his keys from the table and then he was out the door, leaving me alone with a ticking time bomb.

My eyes landing on Karkat once again and I could see he was taking deep breaths, his shoulders heaving as he did so. Prehaps he was trying to calm himself? I couldn't... Oh. Oh shit. Oh wow. He was... He was... I lifted a hand and pried his hands from my mouth which was bit easier than I expected. "Are you... Karkat?" I shifted to sit up, causing him to wobble slightly in my lap. "Are you crying?"

He said nothing. He didn't even move. But he sniffed softly and I knew I was right. I bit my lower lip and reached forward, sliding my hands over his cheeks so I could lift his head. Once those eyes met mine, my heart about stopped. He was crying alright, tears streaming down his cheeks but, those cheeks were flushed. Even though his lips were curled into a snarl I knew him well enough to know this type of crying.

"You infuriating dork." He mumbled, catching his lower lip with his sharpened teeth. His eyes closed, fanning dark lashes against grey skin and caused a few stray tears to slip out.

I smiled softly, brushing them away with my thumbs. I would never tire of hearing him call me that. The softly spoken, affectionate pet name made everything okay. I leaned forward, pressing my forehead against his with a soft smile on my lips. His eyes opened, meeting mine. "I know I am. I'm sorry. I can't help it when it comes to you. I'm in love with you."

He inhaled sharply, his lips curling into one of those soft smiles that made my heart melt and his eyes practically swirled with love. "I heard you the first time."

My lips quirked before pressing to his ever so softly. "I like saying it."

I could feel his smile grow against my lips. "I can't believe I fell for a dork like you."

I couldn't help the grin that came to my face. "Yeah, neither can I."

* * *

"I swear to all that is worth a damn in this life that if you don't leave me the fuck alone, I will remove you from my presence." Karkat grumbled as he once again pushed me away from him.

I grumbled right back at him, snatching his wrist up as I pulled him to my body, slipping an arm around his waist to hold him in place. "Don't be mean."

A deep clicking noise came from the back of his throat, his crimson eyes narrowing as he looked up at me. "Stop being a shitbagging fucksquatting waste of space." He pressed against my chest as he snarled at me, those claws plucking at the thin fabric of my blue sleep shirt.

"What? This is me loving you. If you have a problem with that then _we_ have a problem."

"Oh jesus fucktits John, that's not it." He stopped struggling for a moment, glancing up at me with rather shy eyes and red cheeks. "Let me fucking shower and then you can touch me till your heart's content." I opened my mouth but he suddenly clamped a clawed hand down over it. "Nope, you're not joining me. Because we'll never get clean and the last time we did that, you came inside and it took days for me to get that blithering shit out of me."

"That's what condoms are for." I mumbled, pressing forward to place a kiss into his hair. I couldn't help myself really. Loving Karkat was one thing. Being able to express it was a whole other thing.

Another clicking sound, a warning, before his claws scrapped against my skin and I was shoved backwards to meet frustrated crimson. "No. Stay. We're fucking doing this properly for once in our crotchblistering lives." And with that he disappeared into his bathroom, slamming the door shut and locked it.

I stood there for a moment, blinking after him until it dawned on me exactly what he was referring to. Oh right. Oh fuck right. It was different now. It was one thing to fuck Karkat, it was another to... To make _love_ to him. And being the serious romantic that my boyfriend just happened to be, he wanted to do it right. I didn't do the love confessing thing right so he wanted to at least do this part right. I couldn't argue with that.

I swallowed hard, pushing down the lump that had formed in my throat before stumbling backwards till my legs connected with the bed. I dropped down on it, my heart pounding in my ears as I buried my head in my hands. Fuck. This meant something. Hell, everything I did with Karkat meant something but this... This was different. But it would be okay. I could roll with it. Karkat was still Karkat. Nothing had changed really aside from the fact that we both had been honest about our feelings.

" _Fuck."_ I mumbled softly, rubbing my hands over my face before dropping them. I'd never been nervous with Karkat before. Never. But now I was. I didn't want to fuck up somehow. Because it was _Karkat_. The strangely sweet little troll who liked to pretend he was an ass, though he could be at times, that had taken my heart and would probably never give it back. I'd do anything for him.

My tongue ran over my lower lip before I grabbed the hem of my sleep shirt and tugged it off in one motion, tossing it to the floor. I considered my sleep pants for a second before kicking them off too, leaving me in just a pair of dark blue boxer briefs. I slipped back on the bed till the back of my knees connected with the edge and leaned back on my palms to stare up at the ceiling. I watched the ceiling fan as it spun at a low-speed for a good minute or so.

I never would have guessed five months ago that I would have a relationship like I did. I wasn't hung up on Dave; who wasn't sure about my relationship with Karkat but that was a whole other story. But as soon as Karkat came along it didn't even matter anymore. Things changed almost instantly and it wasn't only because of Karkat. Meeting him and having him in my life was one thing, but I just felt better after meeting him. I was able to finally move past Dave because I came to realize it was best for _me_. Karkat helped more than I could ever explain. It was strange that having someone constantly yell at me and tell me how _s_ _tupid_ I was being actually worked.

Karkat was loud, abrasive, and a bit of an ass but he was loving, affectionate and all around a pleasure to have in my life. He was a breath of fresh air compared to the people I had dealt with on a daily basis. I loved Jade, Rose, and Dave and sure they had their own quirks that made them great to have a friends but Karkat... Maybe it was because he was a troll or maybe it was just cause he was Karkat. Either way, I wouldn't trade him for anything in the world.

My heart swelled at the thought of him. Our relationship may have started with sex but it didn't revolve around it. We agreed the first night that it wouldn't. Love wasn't easy. I never expected it to be. Sometimes it was painful and sometimes, I came to wonder why I tried. Karkat wasn't the easiest person to deal with and even he knew that. He had moments where he snapped for no reason, becoming the ass I knew him to be, but not even moments later he would crash and feel like a piece of shit. He was self-deprecating and the level of hatred he had for himself scared me sometimes. I did my best to make sure he knew he wasn't as horrible as he made himself out to be. Everyone had their moments. Everyone snapped. He was no different and sure he snapped rather often and violently, but he was still Karkat. He would never hurt me and I knew that.

It was something he was working on. We fought occasionally, but most couples did. The best part was making up. A sorry Karkat was a cuddly affectionate Karkat. Something I could definitely live with. I'd come to understand he never meant the things he said when he was angry and he was working on taking out his anger on me. He was doing pretty well about it actually. We hadn't had a large fight in over a month. Our relationship wasn't easy. Love wasn't easy. But we were making it work.

"John."

I blinked a few times, my thoughts skidding into a jumble as I glanced away from the ceiling to the rather attractive troll leaning against the bathroom door. His arms were crossed over his chest as he watched me with an amused expression, his lips curled back into a faint smirk and his cheeks flushed slightly. It took a moment for me to realize he was still naked; his hair still a bit wet from his shower. Damp strands framed his flushed face as my eyes scanned over the vast of grey skin available to me. My heart thumped as I licked my lips.

Karkat was flushed up to his slightly pointed ears and that made my stomach do a bunch of weird flips that left me a little breathless. He pushed off the doorway and sauntered his way toward me, those hips swaying in a way that made my throat dry. Fuck he was beautiful. He didn't think he was, but I knew he was. He at least knew what he did to me. He had to. I'd never been attracted to a troll. Hell, I'd never been attracted to _anyone_ the way I was to Karkat.

"You're staring again." He mumbled softly as he settled into my lap, his knees bent on either side of my waist while his arms slipped over my shoulders, hands burying in my hair till I could feel the tips of claws scrapping gently against my scalp.

My hands immediately went to those hips, a faint smile coming to my lips as I tilted my head back slightly to meet his eyes. His back arched, his chest pressed against mine and I could feel the very tip of his bulge against my stomach. I hadn't even noticed it before but it was sticking a few inches out from its sleath. The pointed tip shifted against my skin, leaving it burning and a little wet, not that I minded. His fingers started to card through my hair causing the tips of his claws to scrap against my scalp, leaving a prickling feeling in their wake.

"It's hard not to stare at you." I pointed out, taking in the way the crimson in his eyes was being overtaken by the black of his growing pupils. Though his cheeks and ears were flushed, his lips bore a smirk that revealed pin sharp teeth. "You're beautiful, after all."

A good roll of his eyes and a soft snort that made me smile even more. "Shut up." He mumbled before sealing his lips over mine. I let him tug my hair, forcing my head back a little as those lips pressed hard against mine. His skin was soft under my fingertips as I brushed over his hips, enjoying the feel of his body arching to my touch. That strange pointed tongue forced past my lips and brushed against my own, sending warmth coursing through my entire body. It was gone, however, before I could return the gesture.

I peeked open an eye and felt my heart thump at the way he looked down at me. Our bodies pressed together, his hands in my hair, my hands on his hips, and his eyes were practically _glowing_. His lips were parted slightly, flashing sharp teeth, and his grey skin held a hint of red. Beautiful color really. My favorite now. I'd once hated it because of Dave. Everything was red for him. Everything. Karkat was different. A lot of solid dark colors. Greys, browns and blacks. So when red was revealed, it was a pleasure. Red over his cheeks, his ears, down his neck. Sometimes where I'd suck a little too hard on his skin or bite just a bit harder than normal. His eyes, his blush, and his bulge. A shocking color of red against a grey scale. And I fucking loved it.

"I pity you so fucking much." Karkat mumbled softly, his eyelids lowering as crimson focused on my lips. "I hate how much I do. I hate how I can't go a plumdicking hour without thinking about you. I hate how easily you get to me. I hate how you make me want to rip out your organs and use them as drapes when you push too hard. But I love it all the same." His fingers tightened in my hair as the word "love".

I couldn't help but smile at him, knowing his eyes were focused on my lips anyway. "I'm not a troll. Pity doesn't count."

Those eyes snapped to mine, a slight snarl on his lips and a soft growl in his throat. "I know that!" He hissed softly. "It started out that way though. Pity, pity; a perfucking pitty party. With your big blue eyes and annoying ass bucktoothed smile. How could I not? How could anyone not?" His eyes narrowed slightly, his shoulders relaxing as I rubbed my hands up his sides. "How did I ever manage to get you?" He whispered softly, leaning closer till his lips were ghosting over mine.

"I ask myself that every day. How did I manage to get such a grumpy, adorable troll to like me?" I chuckled at the way he growled. "The world may never know."

"I love you." He corrected, letting his eyes slip shut.

My spine flushed with warmth as a grin spread out over my face. "And I love you, Karkat."

"Ah fuck." He grumbled before those lips pressed to mine once again. My heart thumped hard in my chest, my stomach twisted and it was the most amazing feeling in the world. Because he loved me. Karkat Vantas _loved_ me. He didn't _pity_ me, which troll "love" was based on. No, he _loved_ me. Human loved me. What a bloody fucking miracle. Gamzee would have a field day when he found out. Miracles all over the place.

A nip to my lower lip brought me back from the little bliss in my head and I let my hands settle on his hips again. I returned his nip, a sly smile on my face as he let out a faint whine. Okay, love had been established. How about some time to show it? I could do that. Definitely do that. I mean, I'd been showing it anyway but Karkat had been pretty stern about what we could and couldn't do before he was sure this was a relationship that would last. Pretty sure he was sure now. He had to be. If not, I'd come out with a few more scars, nothing to complain about.

I grasped his hips, lifting him slightly till his ass pressed over my slightly aroused groin. We both hissed at the contact, his tongue forcing its way into my mouth once again. I took the time to savor his taste, licking around his sharp teeth and strange pointed tongue. Karkat's taste was impossible to explain. But it was distinct. It was all Karkat.

I rubbed my hands over his sides, around his hips and slipped down the globes of his ass to give it a good squeeze. He made a soft startled noise that disappeared in my mouth. His claws slipped over my scalp, leaving pleasurable chills in their wake before slipping down the back of my neck to grip my shoulders. His tongue retracted before those lips pressed against mine, leaving a few soft kisses before trailing over my cheek and down my neck.

He was so _warm_. I could feel the heat radiating off his body, his body temperature rising with his arousal. His thighs clamped down around my lap for a second before he slipped down, leaving me slightly surprised as he dropped to his knees on the floor and practically shoved his face into my groin. I let out a gasp, my eyes snapping open to watch as he mouthed my half-erect cock through the flimsy fabric of my boxers. His eyes were glowing as they stared into mine, never once looking away as that mouth lined my cock. I grit my teeth, unable to look away and shivered at the pleasure that ran through my body. It was soft, barely there, but it was lovely.

Then his claws plucked at the fabric of my boxers as he sat up a bit more, his hands rubbing up my thighs before meeting the hem. Never once looking away, Karkat dipped his claws under the hem and tugged. I lifted my hips automatically as he tugged them down and winced when they caught on my hardened cock. Karkat finally glanced away to pluck the hem off my erect member and tugged the boxers down over my knees. I didn't even have a chance to shiver at the cool air on my cock before those sinful lips were on it.

" _F-Fuck_." I gasped in surprise, bending over slightly at the sudden wet heat coating the tip of my cock. My hands dug into his hair, my eyes begged to squeeze shut but I refused because fuck did Karkat look amazing. It wasn't something he'd ever done to me before. Something we had agreed to wait on until well, we knew for sure. Because sure, we'd had sex plenty enough. I'd been inside him countless times. But _this_ was intimate On some level, this required trust and a certain type of love. Maybe not for everyone. But for Karkat and I, it always had. Thus, an idea was sparked in my head.

I watched with narrowed eyes as his tongue slipped over the foreskin of my tip, circling around before dipping beneath it and holy jegus did that feel amazing. His eyes focused on what he was doing but the simple image of him doing such a thing to me was snapshot and stored away in my brain. I tugged on his hair gently, trying to gain his attention but he didn't even bother to pull away. The corners of his lips curled into a soft smirk and he pushed forward, taking the tip fully into his mouth and _sucked._

" _Ah! Shit!_ " I grasped his soft hair a bit tighter and tugged till he finally pulled his mouth off my cock. "F-Fuck Karkat." I panted softly, watching him with wide eyes.

"Why'd you stop me? I thought you wanted that." He grumbled, his lips pulled into a scowl as he sat back on his knees, his hands still gripping my thighs. His brows were knit together and there was a slight bit of uncertainty in his eyes.

"Oh fuck Karkat I do." I leaned forward, grasping his face between my hands. "But there's something I want more. Come here." I tugged him slightly until he moved to his feet and crawled over me. We moved up the bed before Karkat settled over me while I laid back, grasping over the back of his thighs to pull him closer. His hands formed fists on either side of my head as he hovered over me, pressing his hips down into mine and _oh hellfucking yes_.

"Is this what you want?" His words were a purr as that thick wet bulge of his wrapped around my cock, squeezing as he pushed our hips together.

" _Ah-_ Yes-Wait, no. Yes. shit Karkat." I stumbled over my words, grasping the back of his thighs to keep him close. "I don't, I, I want." I tried to calm my racing heart, slipping my hands up his sides as I met his eyes. "Do you trust me?"

He blinked at the question, tilting his head slightly. "Yes?"

"Okay then." And then, with a good grasp and tug, our positions flipped till he was beneath me, pressed into the mattress.

Glowing crimson watched me with curiosity, a sly smirk on his lips as his claws trailed down my arms that kept me hovered over him. I licked my lips before pressing them to his, enjoying the way his body arched into mine and his head tilted back. It was so natural. We were so natural. The way his body curved into mine, fitting together like the strangest puzzle piece in the world.

His claws scraped along my biceps while I licked at his lips till they parted and his thighs spread apart so I could settled between them comfortably. That pointed tongue lapped at my own, leaving shivers over my skin as I pressed closer to him, sliding my hands up till I could lean on my elbows. Soft hair spread through my fingers till the tips found candy corn colored horns.

Karkat's back arched slightly, a moan coming from the back of his throat as my fingers pressed gently against his horns. The texture felt familiar and I knew for a fact it was unique to Karkat alone. How I knew that was another story as well. Simple fact; don't honk a horn around Gamzee. Or you'll get horns in your face. I trailed my fingers away from his horns, planning to please him without having to use them. I ruffled his hair slightly, savoring the feel of his lips against mine before shifting to kiss down his jaw line and neck.

His head tilted, allowing me more access as I nipped at the soft grey skin. I loved how his skin flushed red where I kissed and nipped. Proof I had been there. Proof he was mine. I moaned faintly at the thought, lapping at his sweet skin before shifting down. By now, Karkat's breath was coming out in soft pants, his eyes were glowing though they were half lidded and his cheeks were the most perfect shade of red. So much red.

I knelt between his spread legs, his feet flat on the bed with his knees bent on either side. His bulge curled against his stomach, leaving a beautiful translucent red over his grey skin. I licked my lips and for a moment, I just stared at him. He was beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. And he was _mine_.

"John." He growled out my name, his hands curling on either side of his head as he watched me. "Are you just going to stare or are you going to _fuck_ me?"

My spine shivered at the thought but I shook my head, lowering my eyes to his twisting bulge. I didn't say a word. I didn't want to give him a chance to stop me. I slipped to lay on my stomach, wrapped my hands around his thighs and buried my face in his nook. Karkat let out a sharp yelp of surprise, his claws immediately digging into my hair and his thighs clamping down around my head.

It was suffocating at first. Perhaps diving right in had been a bad idea. But all I could smell was him. The slightly fruity scent of his genetic material, as he would call it, was intoxicating and warm against my face. But fuck did those claws hurt. I pulled back slightly, glancing up to see his bulge twitching violently and his eyes as wide as I'd ever seen them. The red was almost impossible to see, completely taken over the black of his pupils and the yellow was even more vibrant. Oh fuck. He'd never looked like that before.

"What the ever-loving hell do you think you're doing?" His voice was weak, hardly a whisper, and thick with lust. So I didn't fuck up. Not with that expression on his face or with the way his chest was heaving.

I let the grin spread to my lips, able to taste a bit of him. He wasn't dripping yet but he would be if I had anything to do about it. "Making love to you?"

He took a few deep breaths to seemingly calm himself. "John Egbert, that is not making love. That is putting the mouth that I kiss in a place that only your cock should go."

I only grinned back at him. "You just did it to me."

"That's different."

"How?" I countered, unable to hold back a soft laugh at the way he racked his brain for an answer.

"Because! It's my nook! That-Fuck-John you don't-Aren't you disgusted?" His cheeks flared to life, his lip catching on his bottom teeth. He was _embarrassed_. Oh fuck that was cute.

"We talked about this, Karkat."

"Yeah, but you. _Fuck_." His whole body shivered, his eyes slipping shut for a moment. When they opened again, the crimson was even less visible than before.

"Let me? Please? I really want to." I licked my lips before ducking my head down to ever so slightly let my lips press against the area where his bulge came out. He made a strange sound that made my toes curl and his bulge suddenly went straight. Something I'd never seen it do, nor was I aware it was capable of doing.

" _John_." He purred softly, his eyes closed as his head titled back in the pillow. His claws scraped against my scalp, tugging at my hair and I knew it would be alright. He didn't seem to want me to stop.

I took a deep breath, licked my lips and then pressed forward, kissing the lips of his nook. His claws scraped a little more but I chose to ignore them to concentrate on something I'd never done before. I slipped my tongue out, licking at the seam before pushing forward, my nails digging into his thighs as the potent _taste_ of him. It was strange, different, but not unpleasant. He was so warm. Hot. Something I was used to feeling around my cock which made it twitch in response. I breathed through my nose as I went to work giving his nook experimental licks.

I licked around the hole, over the lips and up to where his bulge came out from inside him. That had once heck of a reaction. The sounds he made were different from normal. More primal; more... troll-like. It urged me on. I let my hands rest around his twitching thighs as my tongue made work at fucking his nook. Which sounded a lot more lewd then... No it was lewd. I knew that. And I didn't care.

It was warm and wet, and tasted a little sweet. The deeper I forced my tongue, which wasn't too deep, the more Karkat started to drip. That I was used to. But my tongue could only go so far. So I opted to keep licking around his nook, enjoying the sounds he kept making and the way his legs wrapped around me and his body twitched. I wasn't sure what I was doing but apparently, I was doing something right.

At least I thought I was until I was suddenly slapped over the head by something heavy and wet. I blinked, pulling back slightly to see his bright red bulge flapping about in the air before it smacked me in the face.

"Shit." I flinched, grabbing it so it could wrap around my fingers. "Control this thing, Karkat." I mumbled, my breath coming a little hard.

" _Can't_." He moaned out softly, his hands tugging at my hair before he released it. He brought a hand up to his mouth, biting into the back of it as he watched me with wide, almost black eyes. His entire body was flushed red and my heart thumped at that. " _John, don't stop, oh holy fucktits don't stop._ "

My eyes widened slightly, my cock throbbing with a need I wasn't ready to fulfill. How could I with the way Karkat was practically kneading the sheets with one hand and begging me to not stop. "Well don't slap me with your bulge again." I mumbled softly, more even than I felt, before lowering myself back down again. Before I could even press my lips to his nook, I was slapped again. "Damnit." I groaned, squeezing his bulge in my hand as I dipped my tongue inside him.

" _Yes, fuck yes, holy rumpusfuck, John. don't. god that feels, ah, that feels._ " His words were a jumbled mess mixed with strange alien sounds and moans. I soaked it all up. I wanted to bring him over the edge this way. So I shoved my tongue inside once again, circling around his inner walls as they clamped down while squeezing his bulge to the best of my ability. But it wasn't enough for him. At least not for his bulge. It wanted more attention that I wasn't sure how to give it without actually being inside him.

The bulge slipped over my fingers, coating them in translucent red as I thoroughly tongue fucked the troll I loved. Karkat's moans come out a little higher pitched, his body flinching in a familiar way and I was sure I'd accomplish my goal. But that was all ruined when his bulge slipped from my fingers and down to where my mouth was. It slipped along my face, making my close my eyes and pull back slightly. I didn't have a chance to stop it when it slipped past my lips and into my mouth.

Karkat's words jumbled together into a mantra of my name and the word 'fuck' while his back arched almost off the bed. I pressed my hands into the mattress to hold myself steady as the strange wiggling bulge slipped down the back of my throat. My eyes widened and I nearly choked on it as I grasped for it, tugging it from my lips. I gasped for air, holding the wiggling bulge the best I could as I tried to catch my breath.

"K-Karkat! Fuck, you almost choked me."

" _Can't_." He gasped for breath, his claws ripping and grasping at the sheets beneath him as he glanced down at me. I shivered at just how fucking sexy he looked. Like he was being ripped apart by pleasure and I made him feel that way. Well fuck. I couldn't take much more of this without busting something. "No control. It does, what, it, wants." He spoke between deep breaths that seemed to calm him slightly.

"Apparently, it wants to fuck something." I mumbled before an idea came to me. I glanced up at my lover, seeing the way his chest rose and fell with each breath. I used the back of my arm to wipe the wetness from my face the best I could before moved up beside him on the bed.

Karkat looked panicked for a split second before I settled beside him, grabbing his hips to pull him on his side and back against me. He rolled on his side completely like I wanted him to and allowed me to press my hips against the globes of his ass. He purred out softly, a hand going behind him to grasp my hair and pull me into his neck. I laid soft kisses against his flushed skin as my hand worked his way to his front, brushing over tense muscles before grasping a wiggling bulge.

" _Please, oh fuck, please John_." He purred, tilting his head back as his hands covered mine on his bulge. I loved hearing him beg because it wasn't something he did very often. Karkat was a stubborn little ass who would rather sulk in his own hatred than ask for anything, let alone beg. But this, this was different. Fuck, this was love.

"I have a better idea." I mumbled softly, using one hand to lift his thigh while the other guided his bulge down. The strange thing twisted against my fingers before finding a hole which it could enter. I smirked softly, watching Karkat's face as his own bulge slipped inside himself. The way his breathing stilled, his eyes popped open and his mouth dropped in a moan made my cock twitch in excitement. The bulge slipped as far in as it could manage given the position and I could only imagine what it was doing inside of him. Certainly things I could never do with my cock. And that was okay. Because the pure look of pleasure and lust on his face was enough for me.

I continued to hold his thigh up with one hand while the other slipped over his nook, coating my fingers in his warm wet liquid. I bit my lip, taking in the feel of his bulge inside his nook before slipping my hand back over his ass. Karkat arched, shifting just enough so I could slip my coated finger between his cheeks. Good thing about troll genetic material. There was always a lot of it and it liked to stay wet warm and coat everything possible. Sometimes it was messy, more times than not, it was convenient lube.

Taking Karkat from behind like this wasn't something I hadn't done before. But while he fucked himself? Yeah, that was new. Actually the whole bulge in nook thing was new to me though I was sure he'd done it on his own before. Gamzee had ways of spilling things no body needed to know he knew.

I took a deep breath, pressing a finger past the tight ring of muscle only to have Karkat suddenly dig his claws into my thigh. One hand had grabbed my hair while the other had grasped my thigh. I hissed softly, feeling the slice of skin that was all but familiar.

" _crotchblistering son of a basketcase, don't._ " He breathed, his eyes closed tightly and his lips parted as he panted. _"I can't. Don't make me wait."_

"I'm not hurting you." I pointed out, biting my lower lip rather hard to keep my urges at bay. Of course I wanted to just plunge in and sure, Karkat would love it even if it was painful cause he was a strange little troll who liked some pain with his pleasure. But I loved him and he would regret it later. Not being able to sit for a few days was bad for a guy who spent most of his time on his ass, listening to other people's stupid problems. No reason to make him more grumpy than normal. "Be patient." I murmured against his ear, giving his neck a kiss as I started to prepare him.

Karkat growled softly but didn't fight me. _"AH_. You try, having a bulge in your nook _ahhh_ and being patient _oh holy grubfisting shit._ "

I chuckled softly, rubbing my finger over his walls before adding a second one. "Tell me what it's doing."

He froze for a second before glancing at me over his shoulder. Wow, the crimson was gone though his face was about as red as his bulge. " _What_?" He hissed softly, his lips curling up over his teeth.

"Peg me curious." I nipped at his shoulder, earning a faint moan for my effort. "Tell -bite- me -kiss- what -bite- its -kiss- doing -bite." I whispered between biting and kissing his shoulder, smirking at the way he squirmed and moaned.

 _"Fuck you and your gross ass kinks._ " He moaned out, letting his eyes slip shut as he pressed his ass back against my fingers. "It's, _ah fuck_ , it's moving. A lot. The tip... it's flicking around inside like a lost grub looking for its mother, _oh jesusfucktits_." He gasped for air, arching his back slightly as I added another finger.

"How do you feel?" I started to spread my fingers inside him, smirking at the way his hips rolled back into my fingers.

"Full. _Fuck John_. I can't. I'm fine. I'm ready. Fuck me already before my bulge makes me come."

"Wouldn't want to be outdone by your bulge now would I?" I teased lightly, nipping his slightly pointed ear as I pushed my fingers in as far as I could. The moan I received was exceptionally pleasing and proof enough that he was ready. One thing about trolls. Didn't have a prostate. Anal wasn't as pleasing as nook. But, well, his nook was now preoccupied and I really couldn't wait any longer.

Using a bit more of his fluid, I coated my dick, wincing at how sensitive it was. I wouldn't last long. That was for sure. I'd been straining for a while now. I angled my hips, grasped his with one hand, placed myself at his entrance and waited a good five seconds before pushing the tip inside. Karkat scrambled for a hold on something. His hand found my hair again, gripping tightly while his claws went back to gripping at my thigh. The word 'fuck' came out of his lips in a long drawn out moan that made me shiver and my cock twitch.

Pleasing Karkat was the best. I got off on him getting off. Always did. But fuck he was tight. Really fucking tight and as I pushed more into him, my foreskin peeled back and holy fucking hell I wouldn't be able to take much of that. It was so wet, warm and tight. Different than his nook, yet not too much. Fucking perfect just like the rest of him.

I slipped an arm under him before wrapping both around his torso, hugging him tightly against me as I thrust my hips till I was completely inside him. Claws dug into my thigh, breaking skin, though I didn't mind. I buried my head in his neck, smiling as his hair brushed against mine and his grip on my hair became more tender. We were together. We were complete. Fuck did I love this troll.

" _John._ " Karkat purred, pressing back against me until I rolled my hips. The thrusts were sloppy and hardly even worth being called thrusts. But they rocked Karkat's body and with the way his walls clamped down over me, it wouldn't take much. Probably not for both of us. So I held him tightly, laid kisses over his neck and moved with him, enjoying the twisting band in my lower stomach.

"Fuck I love you. Goddamnit I love you." Karkat mumbled through a fit of moans, his body convulsing and I could only imagine what his bulge was doing to him.

"And I love you. More than I could ever _ah_ explain." I moaned out, pulling him as close as I possibly could.

Claws scraped at my skin, primal sounds came from his throat and it took all I had to not release right then and there. I swallowed hard, letting my head rest in the crook of his neck as I moved inside him, feeling pleasure course through my body. It was overwhelming honestly. Warm, wet, tight and comforting. I could practically feel the love surrounding me. It wasn't that different from any other time I'd been with Karkat but on some level, it _was_.

And maybe Karkat felt it too. Because with a gasp, a deep claw to my thigh and a strangled sound of my name, he came hard and rather violently. I didn't have a chance to pause as he convulsed in my arms, genetic material coating the area between us and with one more thrust mine joined his. I saw white for a moment, my body convulsing along with his as pleasure crashed wave after wave over me.

Karkat panted loudly, his body gone limp as his hands fell away from me. I wasn't in much of a better state, letting my arms unfurl from him and carefully pulled myself out of him. It was a mess. A huge mess and Karkat had just showered. But it didn't even matter. I planted a soft kiss to his cheek, smiling at the way he leaned into it as he curled up into a purring ball. I sat up, running fingers though his hair as he continued to purr in contentment.

I slipped out of bed, wobbling slightly on my feet as my head was suddenly rushed with blood. Karkat groaned, a hand reaching for me as I moved away from the bed. I snickered softly, leaning down to gather him up in my arms. Karkat didn't fight it when I lifted him up bridal style, a little more difficult than I expected. But I was wobbly, like jello. I cradled a purring troll to my chest as I made my way into the bathroom. I didn't bother with the light as I sat down on the edge of the bathtub, holding Karkat against my chest with one hand as I plugged and ran the water in the tub.

"Pity, pity, love, love." Karkat mumbled, the purring loud enough to effect his words. He was always the most content and affectionate after love-making. It was rather adorable honestly. I rocked him slightly, petting his hair as I waited for the tub to fill with water. "Egbert. Love. Fucker."

I snorted softly, planting a kiss to his hair. "Yea yea, I love you as well." I twisted the knobs to stop the steaming water that now filled half the tub. "Alright. Come on, help me out here. This won't be easy." But Karkat just nuzzled closer to my neck, mumbling about things I couldn't make out. I threw one leg over the edge of the tub, dipping it in hot water before the other followed. I slipped into the water, pulling Karkat along with me into the water.

He jerked awake, snapping his head up at the hot water, glancing around before meeting my eyes. "You realize I have to now sit in here for a good hour." He pointed out, his brow knitting together.

"I know. I came with you didn't I?" I nuzzled into his hair, pulling him to sit between my legs and lean back against me. His head tilted back against my shoulder while I let my chin rest on his, noticing how the clear water started to tint red. I hummed softly, nuzzling into his cheek before kissing it softly. "Hey Karkat?"

He grunted, glancing at me from the corner of his eye, obviously too comfortable to bother moving.

"Thanks."

He blinked once, twice, a third time before he turned his head enough to look at my face. "For what?"

"Eh, you know. Being you. Loving me, lots of things."

He snorted, letting his eyes close. "Don't thank me, dork. It's your nooknumbing fault anyway."

I grinned, nuzzling into his neck. "Yeah. I love you."

Karkat turned his head slightly, enough to brush his nose over my cheek and plant a kiss to my jaw line. "I love you, Dork."

**Author's Note:**

> I suck at endings. Like hardcore suck. And this took me forever to write. So, listen, few things I want to explain about this.
> 
> 1- I love Gamzee and I hope to write more with this AU that involves him.
> 
> 2- I don't believe in saying "i love you too". It's always "and I love you" or "i love you as well".
> 
> 3- I've never written something like this before. And I love it.
> 
> Thanks guys! I hope you enjoyed it! Please let me know what you think!
> 
> ~Addy~


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